This will happen...

......at the PLAAAYGROUND, ya know? Thank you to the lyrical talents of the 90's child group ABC for getting this song stuck in my head every time I started mentally penning this blog.
I can see winter right around the corner. It's taunting us with these dark cold mornings that make it difficult to get out of bed, assuming I wake up on time to begin with. Most mornings I see that it's still pitch black outside and assume I have many hours of Zzzzzzzzzzzzzs ahead of me, only to see it's 6:15 and I have to rush to get ready before Annie wakes up. Which never happens and then I have her on my hip or tugging the leg whilst trying to get lunches made and coffee consumed. I heard there's something called an "alarm clock" but those are for college kids and nerds.

So, Winter. Which means I will be trapped inside with a toddler that has the energy level of a jackrabbit with a nasty meth habit. I am not looking forward to you, winter. In an effort to eek out the last bit of enjoyment from this lovely fall, we have been hitting the local parks system. Hard.

For the grandparents/aunts/uncles out there that plan on ever taking Annie to the playground, I have compiled a list of things that will happen each and every time:

-Annie will be struck down violently by another child swinging on the swings. Apparently the whole "what goes up must come down" concept is lost on the 16 month old set.
-Annie will find a smaller child and will assault that child, usually in the form of a full body tackle. Whether or not this is all done in good fun is up for debate. Sorry, Charlie.
-Annie will find a morsel of food that dates back to the Regan administration that has been picked over by all the local rats and mice that run the playground at night and will try to eat it.
-Annie will drink from another child's sippy cup.
-You will think that because she dropped the world's biggest #2 right before you left home that you certainly won't need to bring your diaper bag. You will be wrong and will learn that it was actually the world's second largest #2.
-Something will happen (the list is really endless and may include any of the options noted above) that will make you feel like all the other parents at the playground think you are an unfit mother.
-Annie will again be struck down by another child swinging on the swings.

And this is all with us paying CLOSE attention. Whether or not any or all of this is normal playground behavior is unknown to me. But it's SOP for Annie Erwin's adventures at the park. But, despite all of the above, it is fun, Annie loves it, and we get out of the house. So to avoid being trapped indoors with a toddler with cabin fever, look for us patronizing the local playgrounds this winter. Annie will be so bundled up, it might be hard to recognize her. She'll be the one knocked out under the swings.