mmmm, mediocrity....But all this candy talk did get me thinking of the awesome candies of our youth. I probably considered all candy awesome at the time because I had such limited access, but in looking back there were some real stinkers. I am looking at you slo pokes, necco wafers, and good 'n plentys. However your grossness was overshadowed by the greatness of thinks like Fun Dip, Mike 'n Ikes (I recently plowed through a HUGE theater sized box while not in the appropriate movie setting) and pop rocks. 
Hopefully we can all agree that these little doggies are the most offensive of the old school candies. The effort to reward ratio is grossly skewed when it comes to the Candy Button. Let me take 5 minutes to try to peel this tiny little piece of candy off this waxed paper that it's likely glued on to with some sort of toxic waste only to get a mostly flavorless blip of crap. The more desperate (not me mind you, I would never) just took the whole sheet and ran it across our mouths like maniacs. I bet blind people hated these too.
Candy Buttons: making children insane with diappointment since 1973.
'agree to disagree'? um, no. candy, just like politics and religion, is a very black and white issue. some candy sucks. like those candy peanut deals-they suck. also(and this is a bit off-topic)having raisins on cookies sucks. raisins are for raisinettes. chocolate chips are for cookies. if i wanted to eat fruit, i would EAT FRUIT, not coo....who is reading this, anyway?
ReplyDeleteNo one. So you were saying?
ReplyDeleteLiza doesn't like to mix desserts with fruit either. Just one of the one zillion quirks in our family.
Raisinettes, really? don't they get stuck in your dentures? Rick likes those too, so they are automatically old man candy.
Now I want chocolate chip cookies. Jerk.
actually i'm not that crazy about raisinettes either. just couldn't come up with another use for raisins.
ReplyDeletedid you get the oatmeal choc chunk cookie last time we went to fido?
btw- worst candy ever: sewdish fish. taste like they're made with the same sugar substitue that they use in Tab, and they get stuck in your teeth like nothing else. i still have swedish fish in my teeth from the reagan administration(yes, ladies-i'm available!)
Now you've said too much. Swedish fish are the best! They are not too gummy and are generally awesome. I must have stolen 20 pounds of Swedish Fish from a local grocery store's bulk foods section over the years. Of course, as with any candy, if you get a bad/stale batch, all bets are off. An old swedish fish could rip out a brand new molar.
ReplyDeleteOf course, it appears you are eating the off-brand Sewdish Fish, so that might be your problem.
I didn't know fido carried cookies. I am usually pretty hung over in that place and am focusing on trying to maximize my grease intake. Good? Raisins in general are not my favorite. I blame Camp Longhorn.
How anyone could pass up a tab drinking bachelor with questionable oral hygiene and makes references to the Reagan administration is a mystery to me.
wrnog. sewdish fsih are terrilbe.
ReplyDeleteYes I do like Boston Baked Beans, Cowtails, Bit-o-honey, Lemon Drops, and Fireballs. Maybe the problem is you are high dollar candy. All of the candy I like can be purchased for $0.25 at the gas station glass windows. Which I'm sure you will point out shows I'm a man of convenience and time management, maybe also cheap. I've got no time to walk down the candy lane, I'll take these right here and at 4 for a Susan B Anthony I get a variety.
ReplyDeleteI will say Goetze's "Carmael Creams Bulls-Eyes" suck.
P.S. Candy Buttons are a kid managment tool.
ReplyDeletelet's go for a record number of responses here.
ReplyDeletebtw i'm eating a blizzard cake right now. blizzards are the best thing that has ever happened in human history.
BLIZZARD CAKE????? Who got married? First you bring up chocolate chip cookies and then blizzards. You are evil.
ReplyDeleteNow, I don't know that I have had a blizzard cake. I have had a DQ ice cream cake, which was also awesome. Can you choose your mixins in a blizzard cake, or are you subject to the whims of the cake maker? Does your cake have that ribbon of fudge in it? Can you tell I am hungry?
Butterfingers are my mixins of choice with ice cream. Discuss...
I like the fact that a blizzard cake = wedding.
ReplyDeleteAbout those Swedish fish...I just polished off a small bag on the plane today and all teeth are still in check. However, I was starving about 30 minutes later. Confirmation our prized Swedish fish are 200% sugar (that's right, 200%) Rick - Boston Baked Beans...really? ;)
ReplyDeleteyou ate swedish fish on purpose? were they out of every other type of candy? was this flight in eastern europe?
ReplyDelete